OMG

Ok I posted last week about how happy I was Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip is back on NBC and it was SO GOOD TONIGHT!!!!!!!!! I laughed, cried, and am bummed I have to wait til next Thurs to see what'll happen next. I would pay people to watch this show with me so I have someone to talk to about it! It's the best drama on tv ever... and Matthew Perry is the best he's ever been. Any Matthew fans?

Mindfulness

I saw something on Oprah yesterday that has me thinking: in Western society everything we do is mindless. I'm so busy with what I have to do next I never focus on what I'm doing now. And even seriously mundane things: how do my legs feel as they drape over this chair? When I eat, do I think about not only how it tastes, but also how it feels? When I hold my kids do I smell them, enjoy the warmth of their skin on mine, be in the moment with them rather than going through the motions but inwardly thinking about the laundry I have to fold? When I'm driving do I marvel at the fact that not only are the trees green but that, when the sun hits them they're actually 100 different shades of green? These small things are the key to happiness. And unfortunately, the new-age Eastern religions are way better at being in the moment than we are. In this country you have to be dying before you slow down enough to smell how sweet the grass smells in the morning. You know? I want to be more mindful of things; I really think it's the key to true thankfulness.

It's Baaaaaaaaack...

YAYYY! Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip is the Matthew Perry show that had an awesome start on NBC, slowly lost ratings and got put on "haitus" for awhile. Tonight it was back on NBC at 9 pm and it's amazing!! I've loved this show from the beginning: excellent social commentary on the relationship between Christianity and Hollywood (the leading lady is a born again very cool Christian, they actually don't make her look like an idiot, and she is the love interest of Matthew Perry who's a non-practicing Jew. They spar a lot, but with lots of chemistry thrown in so it's smart and sexy both.) WATCH THIS SHOW!!!!! It's so smart and so fun and Matthew Perry is at his best. love it love it love it. Join me so we can chat about it!

6 year olds

I post frequently how happy I am to be out of the baby stage, my kids are in first and third grade, we do fun big girl stuff together, etc. This is true 99% of the time. Tonight got to be part of the 1%. My Hannah, who's extremely "spirited" for lack of a better word, was given silly putty by her grammy tonight. We got in the car to come home and within probably 4 minutes she says "Mom we may only have to cut out a little of my hair..." THIS IS NOT GOOD. I repeat, this is not good! I look in the rear-view mirror to assess the damage, and yep there's a glob attached to her scalp about half the size of my palm. My mom (whom I called to THANK FOR THE SILLY PUTTY) said she thought ice would get it out. Long story short nothing worked but a pair of FLIPPIN SCIZZORS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AAGh!!
Sooooooooooo, she has an appointment Wednesday anyway to get her hair cut, thank God, but in the meantime she's a little...spiky...on top. Man that child makes me tired.

No Boys Allowed (or needed?)

ok girlfriends, i'm giving bethany the day off and i'll do the controversy for once. sex toys and christians. how's that?! on my blog last week i was posting about my grandma dying and having to go through her stuff, and a girlfriend mentioned there were certain places in her bedroom that only her one relative is allowed to clean out; she and i had had that conversation b4 and laughed. here's how it started: a few years back there were a group of us girls from church (u remember who u are!) who were invited to some sex toy parties. VERY ENLIGHTENING! and while all i bought for me and dave was a book and some lotion stuff, i did leave the party feeling..."educated" about things i hadn't known b4! the funny part was, when i returned home with the girlfriend i'd gone with, the husbands laughed and said "cool, our wives are buyin porn!!!" (disclaimer: it was NOT PORN, and the sales consultant knew we were all married monogamous christians who were just...um...broadening our horizons! the husbands were pleased nonetheless). so now i'm single, and have been asked by...um...certain girlfriends...how i'm...um...taking care of things. God bless concerned girlfriends!!!!!!!!!!! what do you guys think? Discuss...................... (this should be good..........................)

Life Goes On

Well the funeral was yesterday and you know what? It was ok. The last week and a half of my grandma's life was so bad that we're just relieved THAT PART is over; the rest hasn't really hit me yet, and that's ok. We did just what she wanted with a short visitation, closed casket, same day service, short dinner. Sooooooooooo...now what? I'm trying to get this wedding business off the ground, excited about summer, I have a wedding to do in 2 weeks at church, time to spend with my mom and sister as we go through grandma's house (that'll be hard but good at the same time). This has just all been so long, and she's BETTER now. She's better now. We also have promised to stay in touch with Tom, her second husband she married after my grandpa died 7 years ago; he LOVES my kids and has been widowed twice now (can you even imagine?) so we will be visiting him at his house in Boone Grove often. Finally, I may have a date next week...but that'll have to wait for another post! Today is for my Grandma Bair, 74 years old, who doesn't have cancer in heaven. Thank God.

The Priviledge of the Invisible

I've had the exhausting and daunting task recently of, along with my family, aiding my grandmother on her journey to the next world. She is a believer which makes that journey easier on US, but she's suffering horribly now and that's obviously hard on HER. I was "on watch" all night last night, taking a turn as family members do in times like these, staying up with her for the night and holding her hand, giving her her meds, etc. She's completely incoherent now, and we're using hospice and their philosophy of minimal intervention which is FABULOUS. As in giving birth, THE BODY KNOWS WHAT ITS DOING. We know how to live, and as much as we don't want to hear it we also know how to die. It's been a priviledge this week to be with my grandmother as she takes these last steps into eternity, watching her withdraw and go inward, watching her begin to "see" lost loved ones from the past, even "see" Jesus as she mumbled to us this morning. I'm struck with memories of being in labor with Hannah, so focused on the inward workings of my body and so unconcerned with anything going on around me; so it is with the dying, who may look sweaty or curled up on a pillow uncomfortably but who actually don't even realize it. I was chewing on this notion this morning in the wee hours, realizing that those who die are also birthing: when we birth babies we're birthing new life, and when as Christians our mortal bodies begin to separate from their spirit we also are birthing new life. It really is miraculous, and I've been struck these days of how "un-morbid" it is. It is terrible seeing her in pain, and with the help of hospice we're doing everything possible to make her comfortable. Fortunately it really is almost over, and in the meantime I've been allowed to watch someone take their first steps into the realm of the invisible world. Pretty cool actually.