Blizzard 2009

Wow. I don't know where to start... I haven't seen snow this deep in 25 years. We grew up in Liberty Township between Valpo and Chesterton in a farmhouse with a 600 foot long driveway. My mom was a single parent with 3 kids, and on yeah no snowplow. So when it snowed like this back then we parked the car in the road at the end of the driveway, loaded our arms with the groceries or tote bags or whatever, and the 4 of us would trek up the driveway in 4 ft snowdrifts. We loved it; I'm guessing the mommy probably did not:) Anyway those are some very old memories that I return to today, after taking pictures with my kids of snow at the top of my SUV's tires this morning. It's actually sunny and very pretty out right now...and thankfully I don't have a 600 feet driveway to walk! Snow stories anyone?

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I wrote a letter to my kids who are in school, as I sat in my store alone on this snowy day, watching the Inauguration. Other nations have royalty...positions one has to be born into...thus excluding the masses. The great thing about America (in theory if not always in practice) is that being born into poverty or obscurity doesn't guarantee it has to remain that way. Historically the reality has not always lived up to this ideal, but today don't we feel as though it might? And so I wrote to my daughters as Rick Warren prayed, blessing them and our family and our nation and reminding them that we live in a day when and where THEY CAN BE ANYTHING. And that we as a people don't just say it but mean it. No excuses. There are no longer any excuses! What a blessing--out of all the years or places I could've been born--that I was born when and where and who I was. What a privilege to have witnessed what I witnessed today, as a part not only of American but as a part of humanity. Of human-ness. That we're (pardon the cliche) all in this together. Wow.

FACEBOOK

Prepare to be proud. Ready? I had a Myspace page put up a few weeks ago (had an employee do it. Wayyyyyyyyyyyyyyy too complicated for moi). Last night, after much "encouragement" from my good friend Elizabeth, I put up a Facebook page ALL BY MYSELF. Let the accolades begin! Seriously. This is big.

First Loves

Hollywood, America, girlfriends...all point to this syndrome, at one time or another, of "first love" and especially "the one that got away." It seems everyone has a skeleton in their closet of someone they loved from afar, or someone they loved who never returned it, or maybe they returned it but then left, whatever. Most of the people I know who have one of these have them from back in the teens or early 20s, before husbands and children and mortgages, and reality! Thus the lost love then takes on this fantasy-like quality, putting the person on way more of a pedestal than he/she ever would deserve in real life! I have one of these, from eighth grade. Went with him for 9 months (that's a long time in eighth grade!) and he broke up with me after cheating one me (which back then was he kissed someone else) and I was DEVESTATED. Anyone else have a story like that? First love, first breakup? Have you seen them since?

Hoosier Arctic

"Brrrrr" doesn't begin to describe it. Seven was the high yesterday and it got to zero. ZERO. Those of you who live here know what I mean when I say it's possible for cold to burn you. Those of you who've moved are grateful to forget. Those of you who live somewhere warm and don't know what I'm talking about: you suck! Today it's supposed to warm up (I say with a smirk) to fifteen but the windchill is still negative 25. Quick, somebody check my countdown to summer and remind me of how many more days...

Just Call Me Amish-boy

In an episode of Friends (my all-time favorite show) Chandler talks about his cool new laptop and how he can make lists with cool fonts, and Ross asks can't you just use pencil and paper; to which Chandler replies "No, Amish boy." This is how I feel. I've been on blogspot for awhile now and love it for staying in touch with my friends, but I've been accused of lagging behind the rest of the world by not having a myspace page. Especially for my business. So, reluctantly I allowed one of my employees and my brother to construct and instruct... and now you can see me and my store stuff on myspace.com/bridehelper. Mind you I'm not sure I'll know how to respond to you or post or do any of that stuff, at least not yet; myspace seems much harder in that you have to request and invite and stuff...rather than blogspot where anyone can post a response to me and it doesn't require any effort on my part:) Lazy lazy lazy I am! Wish me luck, there's a million brides on myspace who will hopefully find me now! Of course I'll still be here, blogspot is my first love:)

Home Alone

When I was in middle school my mom worked 3-11's so we were home alone after school for literally the whole afternoon and night, and I hated it. But my kids love the idea of being home alone, and because they're only in 3rd grade and 5th grade we limit it; but because of single mom working (just like my mom was) the schedule dictates that they are alone for 30 minutes twice a week til I get home. They love it! There are lots of rules for safety of course, and phonenumbers in case of an emergency, etc etc. Well for the first time we've been faced with the idea of the oldest home totally alone, for about an hour and a half, and she's totally excited she's big enough to be trusted with something this huge. Of course mommy's less excited. And yet I was babysitting OTHER PEOPLE'S kids by 6th grade, so I'm preparing her (and me!) for that by allowing her small amounts of freedom, little by little. What do you guys think? Is eleven too young?

Kouts HoHoHo

Well this is it! My first Kouts Christmas as a business owner. Not sure if you've heard it on Indiana 105 or if you've read about it in the Post Tribune, but we're having the annual Kouts Open HOuses this weekend Saturday and Sunday both. It's unique because HOMES are open with decorations to look at and goodies to buy! How neat is that! I have the maps if anyone wants one:) Plus downtown Kouts is having its outdoor celebration Saturday, with Santa coming into town on a firetruck at 2 and the town tree-lighting at 4:45, with carolers out on the sidewalks and Mary and Joseph in the tent downtown. I'll be open 8:30-6 (yikes!!!) Saturday and 10-4 Sunday. No day off for me! But how fun...my cousin came in today with lots of his woodworking for the store, trunks and hopechests and stuff, and cute home-made ornaments, along with the purses and jewelry I usually have. Wish me luck!

Porn for Women

My mom sent me this email today entitled "Porn for Women." Included were pictures of gorgeous men, doing the following:
--Bringing home flowers for no reason
--Holding a baby
--Vaccuuming
--Washing dishes
--Standing over a stove in an apron reciting the upcoming evening's dinner
We don't need nudity, we don't need money, we don't even need presents. Just be cute and vaccuum. When my sister had her baby my girlfriend sent her a book with a similar theme: artsy photos of different beautiful men holding different beautiful newborns.

Yum.

;)

Gobbles and Gluttonies

I saw Chris Rock do a stand-up one time on all-you-can-eat buffets, and how only in America do you ever hear the phrase "All You Can Eat." I was thinking of that yesterday at my sister's, who hosted Thanksgiving for the first time, and how because of deaths and divorces our crowd was "smaller" this year (only 12 people instead of like 22) and so mom only made three desserts (instead of like 22). Geez louise, we still ate so much I almost made Skylar drive home--lol-- you know you're full when the snaps on your jeans and the steering wheel are BOTH in the way of your stomach and you're NOT months away from delivering a baby. And I'm not embarrassed to say it here cuz I know I"m not the only one :)

So Happy Turkey Day a day late, and happy shopping! Go be patriotic and shop for things we don't need!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1

A Spoonful of Sugar Helps the Medicine Go Down...

I. Hate. American Medicine. Hannah has been fighting increasingly severe headaches for about two weeks now. Long story short she went to the school nurse and we've ruled out eye trouble or sinus trouble. So I have two choices in my arsenal, wonderful Dr. McGuckin who's our naturopath that keeps us healthy on a day-to-day basis, and wonderful Dr. Raelson who's our western medicine doctor who helps us the big stuff. Except the big stuff happens rarely, so we don't see Dr. Raelson that often...and when I called his office today to try to get Hannah in I had to talk to FOUR gatekeepers who gave me the third degree about not having a pediatrician, not visiting the doctor for well-child visits, not vaccinating, etc. The thing is Dr. Raelson himself knows my philosophies and basically laughs at me, stating "We'll just have to agree to disagree." Meanwhile he loves me and my kids and has never had a problem treating us. It's the 16 other people I have to get through first that give me the hassle! Just let me talk to my flippin doctor!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! As of right now I've been on and off the phone for two hours between the school and three calls back and forth to Raelson's office, and still no appointment... maybe if I'd just be a good girl and do what I'm told without asking anything they'd make it easier on me....

Freecycle

Our good friend E has gotten me hooked on Freecycle. For those of you who don't know what that is, type in Freecycle.com and then go to your ZIP code. It's a Yahoo group so you'll have to make a password if you don't already have any kind of a Yahoo account, but then you get to participate in this cool online free garage sale. Well I've been doing it for awhile and I get email alerts whenever something new is posted (like 40 a day, but fun not spam!) Well. Today there were like 5-6 asking for used toys for their kids for Christmas. Y O U G U Y S. I know Christmas will be tight this year for all of us, but omg that broke my heart. One was asking for books, one was asking for snowpants, one was asking for gently used toys for three kids, one was a grandma who just got custody of her grandkids and needs Christmas presents, etc. So I'm going home tonight and going through the Barbies we don't play with, the baby dolls we have doubles of, the Dora books we don't read anymore, and last years snowpants. We may not have money but you know what, we've got STUFF. More stuff than we need! And to pass that stuff on to people who really DO need it...especially with winter coming...makes me cry!!!!

Yay Freecycle!!!!!!!!

Divison of Labor

And I don't mean labor like baby labor, although that feat alone should excuse all women from any other kind of work in my opinion:) No, I mean the labor around your house. As a single mom I do everything from laundry to climbing on the roof cleaning the gutters. Most married SAHMs I know, since they work in the home, do the work of the home: laundry, food prep, scrubbing floors, etc; but many of them also mow the grass and clean the garage. I also know several hubbies who work outside the home but cook many of the family meals. So our generation definitely has a crossover, which I think is GREAT. But. I have a grampa and grampa who've been married 55 years, and he doesn't know how to do laundry. In 55 years the man has NEVER. DONE. LAUNDRY. He doesn't know how to put a tv dinner into a preheated oven. She doesn't know how to work a checkbook. She's never mowed the lawn, and she's pretty much not even ALLOWED in the garage:) Their division is very very rigid...but they've been married forever and so it has obviously worked for them. Do you guys think there's a right or wrong way? Or does it just vary from family to family? Should each person just go by their strengths rather than their gender? What if their partner disagrees?

Voting Virgin

Ok ok ok...now that November 4th has arrived and I went and voted this morning I'll admit it to the world. Or at least my good friends who read this blog:) I've never voted before!!!!!! ISN'T THAT AWFUL? But I did today, and it was sooooo fun you guys. Just feeling like I'm a part of something so much bigger. Regardless of who we vote for there's such a unity, standing in line with fellow citizens, preparing to color in the little circles. And this year it's exciting because of something I heard George Stephanopolis say: whether a woman wins vice-president or a black man wins president, there's this feeling in all of us that wow, maybe the American Dream really is real. Maybe when I tell my 8 year old daughter she can be president someday I can say it without crossing my fingers behind my back. Maybe the desire to vote and be a citizen of the best country in the world isn't dead. Maybe my generation is patriotic after all. Maybe maybe maybe! I'll be glued to the news tonight!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Hilltop--Heaven Sent

Most of you who have lived in Northwest Indiana for any length of time have probably heard about Hilltop. But maybe you've never been there, and maybe you don't know how NICE it is. Well. I own my own business and am a single mom on a limited income for the time being, and don't have health insurance. So I went there to see if I qualified for help with dental work that I DESPERATELY NEED DONE... and was scared because I'd never been there before and didn't know what to expect. I know when I've had to go to the welfare office before to get Hoosier Healthwise for the girls (health insurance for kids) I feel weird because I'm often going after work, which means I'm dressed up. I don't want people there who are legitimately in need to think that somehow I'm taking advantage of the system...and although no one there has ever made me feel that way I still sometimes feel self-conscious. I DID NOT feel this way at Hilltop! The room was a cheery bright yellow, the ladies at the front desk were super nice, there were pretty mums outside the front door. I don't know why cosmetics make such a big difference; it seems so shallow; but they do make a difference! I was very happy with my experience there-- and oh yeah I did qualify for the dental work:)

House for Sale

For those of you who haven't heard, the Wallace girls have found a super cute apartment with a pool in Parkview's school district and are READY TO MOVE. There's just a tiny step of selling the house first! So here are the stats:
2 Bedrooms
1 Bath
1 Car Attached Garage
Full Basement with walk-in storage closet
Schools: Parkview, TJ Middle, Valpo High
Taxes: $1130 with Exemptions
Appliances Stay (stove, fridge, washer and dryer, dehumidifier, lawnmower, window ac)
Updates: New roof 2008, new gutters 2007, new tub and plumbing 2007, new kitchen faucet 2007, new windows 2004
Other features: Hardwood floors, ceiling fans, updated decor/colors, ceramic tile trim around bathtub, Nafco floor in bathroom. Swingset also stays. Nice patio in backyard.
Price: $92,500
Address: 1003 Beech St, seven houses west of Roosevelt Rd, about 6 blocks north of the hospital. Walking distance to school, Kirchoff Park, Banta Center.
TELL PEOPLE! THEN WE'LL HAVE A CHRISTMAS PARTY AT THE NEW APARTMENT!!!!!

"Flourishers" Do It Better

Life, that is. Just read an article on Longevity, with 13 things that you may already do, that help us live longer. One is to eat purple food (grapes, grape juice, blueberries, raspberries, wine). Another is to drink green or black tea. Another is to have friends (awww). But one that stuck with me is the line between what they call Languishers and Flourishers. Kind of the "Glass is Half-Full" vs "Half-Empty" kinda thing. I mostly am a flourisher, in that I'm passionate and know what makes me happy and I laugh a lot and have great family and friends. I have my weeks tho when I'm a languisher, and I can feel it and I hate it! You know when you turn into a whiner and you know you're a whiner and you don't like it about yourself but you do it anyway?! Yeahhhh. Sooo, in spite of the crazy weekend I have ahead of me I'm gonna take two minutes and think about things that make me happy.

Candles.
Good strong flavorful coffee.
The beach.
Books.
Homemade soup.
Reading in bed at the end of the day with my kids.
Cooking.

There. I feel flourished already:) What little goodies make you happy?

Halloween: To Do or Not To Do?

That is the question. We definitely do. The girls aren't allowed to wear icky costumes--Hannah's gonna be Princess Leah and Sky's gonna be a Cubs player--but other than that we trick or treat and decorate and do candy and goodie bags with spider rings and all of it. I know one of our sweet friends southeast of here has to "cloak" her Halloween celebrations with her kids in order to not be labelled a heretic:) Fortunately in northwest Hoosier land I've not been accused of being a Pagan because we carve our pumpkins rather than paint them, but hey there's a first time for everything...

The Body Shop

Wow. That title could really make you curious now that I look at it:) Cars? Hair volume? Porn? What? Alas this post will be very innocent, as it actually refers to a new product line whose philosophy I REALLY like. The Body Shop is a line of skin care and makeup that is totally pro-animal pro-environment pro-fairtrade pro-everywomanisbeautiful and anti-chemical. Go to mistydemarco.com and read their About Us and Our Values. The founder has apparently passed away (really young at that) and I don't know that story, nor had I heard of them before, but my friend Cas in Indy says they do home parties and book shows (she's doing a book show now). Seems really affordable, might be good for Christmas gifts and stuff (the check from my Christmas Club comes the first week of November every year, glory hallelujah!) Cas knows how much I'm into the "naturale" philosophies and once I saw the website I liked it so much I wanted to share it with my fellow tree-hugging mommy friends!

Altogether Now...

Here's a strange phenomenon I've noticed. As an event planner I have weekends every 3 months or so with 4-5 things. As if humans have gotten together and intentionally gravitated toward one particular weekend and planned EVERYTHING at once. Or even unintentionally, whatever. I know we're all busy and we all have the occasional busy weekend, but it's not even that. It's as if we all subconsciously navigate ourselves to particular times/days/gatherings ALL AT ONCE. This has not only occurred one time! Next weekend for example, is one of those that after scheduling two things people would say they needed something for the weekend of the 18-19th and I'd say "Of COURSE you do. Of course." I have a bridal shower, a wedding rehearsal and ceremony, a 3 day church conference, a bridal expo at the Expo Center, and the kids have a cheerleading competition in Danville, IN. I don't even know where that is! So I have a schedule HOUR BY HOUR next Saturday for me, the kids, Dave and Alexis who are keeping the kids and doing the cheerleading, the church, and then Megan who is running the store for me for a couple hours after I leave on Saturday and then doing the reception so I can do the ceremony and then get to the church for the conference we're doing. That's just Saturday! Then there's a different schedule Sunday for each of us as well. It's just one of those weekends where you feel like you'd like to perfect the cloning process so you can clone YOU.